Love isn’t going to fix you. It isn’t going to fix your mental health. It isn’t going to fix your social life. And it isn’t going to fix your heart.
Love isn’t going to make every day beautiful. It isn’t going to transform your world into something that will always be full of light. Love isn’t going to turn your life into a perfect daydream. It isn’t going to become a fantasy.
Love may mask it for a while. Love might mask your pain. It might mask the void. It may mask the holes in your heart. And it may mask your lack of self confidence. But it’s only a temporary mask. It’s only a temporary feeling.
Because once the honey moon stage ends, you won’t feel so high anymore. You won’t feel so stable or settled in. And you’ll realize that yes, love is important. But it is not the end all be all.
You see, love is not paint. It’s not going to fix every scratch and mistake you’ve ever made. It isn’t going to fix your past or gloss it over.
You’ve got to heal those broken parts on your own. You can’t rely on someone else to fix you. Love won’t make you forget the mistakes and the tears and the loneliness. Love is not a magic spell.
You need to be able to forgive yourself before you even begin to think about loving someone else. you need to be able to look at yourself in the mirror and not want to spit at your own face. You need to be able to truly see yourself, to truly be yourself, and to not hate yourself.
Love will come your way when it is meant to. Love will come your way when you love yourself more than you love the thought of loving someone else. You can’t expect another person to make you perfect. You can’t expect another person to make your life full of joy.
Because at the end of the day, this world is lonely and hard and dark.
And you need to believe in yourself first, before you believe in someone else. You need to learn how to love your imperfections and your brokenness. You need to be able to appreciate your past and all the wounds and bruises your heart holds. You need to accept you for you. To accept the pain and the hurricanes that life has brought you.
Only then, can you truly love someone else with your whole heart. Only then, can you build a special bond. But first? Build that bond with yourself. Build that bond with your ugly pieces. And learn how to love them. Because while loving someone else will not fix you, loving yourself will.
By : Lauren Jarvis-Gibson